30 Jan 2007

I hope this absolutely true story makes you feel as good as it did me.

Not too long ago, that Tyrant, that Enemy of Democracy and scourge of the people of Déise, Councillor Paudie Coffey of the County of Waterford, built a palatial establishment for himself on a spectacular hillside site overlooking the Suir. The Coffey Compound, as it were...

Not long after, a humble member of the local community sought planning permission for a modest house on a site downhill from the Red Tyrant’s castle. Red was furious and lodged a detailed objection to the Council complaining that the new house would interfere with the view of the River from his cryogenic therapy room.

Despite Red’s formidable threats, permission was granted for the new house, but there were some onerous height restrictions attached.

As construction of the house began, The Ginger Nut spent his days in the turret of his castle watching every move of his neighbour’s unsuspecting contractors.

When his poor neighbour’s roof was finally finished the Carrot Topped Despot noticed that the ridge line was higher (by a couple of inches) than the conditions stipulated. The council inspectors insisted that the roof be removed and completely rebuilt. Rumour had it that the poor neighbour had to dip into his children’s piggy bank savings to keep the sheriff away.

Months later, the Red Bull was at it again. This time he complained to the planners about some ventilation grilles which his neighbour had put into the gable wall facing Red's castle.

The enforcement people from Waterford County Council went out to the site and this is what they found…

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