It's been a year to the day since I first put pen to paper on the Dispatch. So let's celebrate with a planning doozy. In the week when An Bord Planala, in its annual attempt to convince the politically naive that it's not not an undemocratic elitist quango, published its report, a reminder of the kind of organisation they really are (names and locations changed as usual because, although we value free speech, we (rightly) fear repercussions.)

In the year 2007 the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Gloucestershire and said, ‘Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans.’

I hope Sir Norman has a better sense of humour about this kind of thing that, say, U2 have. Everybody knows about that hat, but remember Negativeland?

‘… U2 (or their) representatives have had absolutely no role or involvement, directly or indirectly, in assessing bids for the (U2 Tower) project or any (adjudicating) role in the tender process…,’